And I don't mean to sound like I am bashing this breed of military wife. I envy it, actually. It takes me a while to find my groove in a new place. I would never live on base, unless forced. I don't like the military to envelope my life. I love that my husband feels joy in what he does. But what he does and what I do are two different things. I need the separation from the base. Minus the time spent overseas, we rarely shop on base, and when Todd gets off of work, the uniform gets taken off and I feel like I can return to my "normal" life.
And I HATE moving. I hate trying to make another house a home, all to realize that I have to do it all again in 2-3 years. I hate leaving old and amazing friends, and it is hard for me to put myself out there to make new ones. I hate that one of the first questions I am asked is "what rank is your husband?" I hate deployments and TDYs. I hear all the time "thank God he's leaving for a week" but I loathe time away from my hubby. I hate when he gets called in or stays late for nonsense that only the military can make up. I want my daughter to grow up almost the same way I grew up...in 1 house for 18 years, friends that I knew in 1st grade and graduated with, a place that always feels like home no matter how long I've been away from it.
A lot of rambling/venting just to say while some spouses thrive in this kind of lifestyle, I have yet to find my groove in it. Luckily I seem to have met at least one person here that makes me feel normal and myself, and doesn't define me by my husband, what he does, or what his rank is. I am trying my best to be open, and will of course continue to support and love my husband to my greatest ability, but I hope that someday I grow more fond of what this lifestyle has to offer. And if anyone has any friendly advice, it is always welcome.
Hugs! I hope all gets better for you.
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